Saturday, March 10, 2012

What's in a Name?

A few weeks ago, my little cousin had a baby and I went to go visit them in the hospital.

...wait...lemme back up a minute. I have two children....two beautiful daughters. Their father and I are not married. However, we are together. And they have his last name. This isn't something that I considered to be a big deal. I think that I have always known what I'd do as far as last names are considered if I had children out of wedlock.

While I was visiting my cousin, my aunt gave me something to think about. I haven't changed my stance on it, but I did begin to wonder how other people feel about it.

My aunt asked her daughter (my little cousin) what is the baby's last name. And to my aunt's surprise, she told her that the baby has her dad's last name. She then looked to me and asked if my kids have their dad's last name too (thinking that I'd say no). When I gave the opposite reply, she quickly began telling us that you should only do that if the father is your husband.

Of course I don't agree with that. I understand that back in the day when our parent's generation was coming up they used their own last name. I believe this was because there was a stigma and embarrassment associated with a woman or girl who had children out of wedlock. Nowadays, it's glorified.

Neither one of these things influences my opinion. I have always felt that if there is a relationship, that's it's okay for the kids to have the father's last name. Hell you two may get married to each other one day. But if he's an a-hole and there's a snowball's chance in hell of him being a good father or of you two being together, then of course use the mother's name.

Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4

No comments:

Post a Comment